no netball. no pauline. that means i have nothing to do at all until the 20th when she comes back. how boring.

had a heart to heart talk with my brother ytd on the car. we were talking about how we thought of each other in the past. i told him i was scared of him because he was super duper mean and fierce. he said i was irritating. because i always do stuff without thinking of the consequences. did i? maybe. he said he actually wanted an elder sister. but i didn tell him that sometimes i rather be the only child. it's not because i dislike having sibilings. it's just i think that parental love can never be shared fairly between more than one child.