always.

date/time Monday, April 30, 2007,8:55:00 PM

match against nanyang junior college today. we won them with a score of 44-20. but i believe that the team can do much better. i dont know... it just doesnt feel like a joyous victory. but well i still have to say this, GOOD JOB GIRLS!! but we gonna work even harder together ((:

my brother just finished his exams and his holidays just started. argh. i get to see him enjoy his holidays when i'm so stressed out by work and nationals. it just isn't fair.. blahh

but well i'm going to survive all these and come out as a stronger person. of course, with the help with my 'superb and always there for me' bestie :D , lovable teammates and dearest class clique (: and my family and everyone who cheered me on during this period of time.

alright! i gonna turn to my pile of work now.. sighs

date/time Sunday, April 29, 2007,11:05:00 PM

it's just one of those days when i wake up in the morning, hoping there'll be a message waiting in my phone.

sound pretty random? oh well i believe there will be someone out there who understands how it feels.

date/time Saturday, April 28, 2007,5:43:00 PM

because i was given a chance to change the path of my life.
to start all over again.
i've learnt to cherish what i have now even more.
but once again i see people who do not treasure their own lives.
they play with it, trample on it.
for whatever reasons that aren't worth it.
it seriously feels really frustrating to see them not wanting to help themselves
when everyone is trying to help them.
you've probably forgotten the people around you.
the love they are showering on you.
you've forgotten and ignored them all.

yes i once thought i was alone too.
rejecting all the care and concern offered by others.
thinking that everyone else let me down.
but the truth was that i've let others down.
it just wasn't worth it to let it pull me down.
you have to let it out.
and give yourself another chance.
i hope you'll be able to read this and think about it.

date/time Thursday, April 26, 2007,4:14:00 PM

NJ NETBALL WON! our very first and most important match out of all the four other matches we gonna have for the first round. we cant afford to lose to vjc. if we lost, there's still acjc which we dont have a high chance of winning. then we'll be out of nationals. but since we won vjc and as long we beat nyjc and tpjc, we'll be in top 8!

the match today was indeed straining for our hearts. from yesterday's score 20 - 16, it was all about keeping our score up above theirs. the score was brought up even closer during the third quad. it became 23- 21. furthermore, the floor was wet and it was drizzling. during the last quad, vjc almost brought the score up to a draw at 27-27. but their goal wasnt counted as the GS didnt shoot in within the goal circle. with 5 mins left, we scored three more goals and they scored one. the game thus ended with the final score of 30-27. many of us teared because our hard work was paid off. go girls! we have nyjc match up next and we will win this again! ((:

last but not least, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAZEL! this victory is definitely the best present you received today (:

date/time Wednesday, April 25, 2007,10:55:00 PM

the match with vjc is not done yet. lightning and thunder came upon during the third quarter. the game had to stop and it shall resume tomorrow morning at kallang. we're now up by FOUR goals. i believe we can pull it further like what ms yim had said, make it eight. we gonna win this and we have to win this.
i knew my judgement of you is right all along. you're definitely not matured enough to get into a relationship.

date/time Tuesday, April 24, 2007,11:05:00 PM

here it is. our long-awaited nationals starts tomorrow. with a match against VJC as a start. from a 'six members team', we came this far with now, with 15 members plus two basketballers. all the killer trainings we had, no matter courtwork or fitness, we've gone through it. all the sweat, bruises, sprained ankles, blood, tears and effort we experienced will definitely pay off tomorrow on court, i believe. we are a bonded team with a common goal. no matter top 8 or top 4 we gonna try our best and finish the game with no regrets.

jeanne, yao en, sasha, annarine, mel, hazel, joyce, huiqi, cheng siang, pauline, joey tay, wenjia, rachel, joey knoo, jieqi, yi feng, we are all in this together and we'll pull it through.

GO NJ NETBALL!

i love my team totally.

i hate it when i see people not treasuring their own life, because it reminds me of how i used to be

date/time Monday, April 23, 2007,11:01:00 PM

HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY JOYCE!!

seriously, you've made many of my school days filled of laughter and joy. so here's wishing you happy always and stay pretty alright? the clique loves you and of course i love you too!! ((:

date/time Sunday, April 22, 2007,11:51:00 AM

these few days had been hectic with the stay-over at marriot hotel (all thanks to joyce and her parents! (: ), ip preview, supporting basketball matches and netball friendly match with the grand-seniors. the stayover was superb and fun. but the best i thought was the food at the executive lounge. the donuts and croissant made me break my diet plan. sheesh. pauline said i've sinned. i think so too. the bed in the hotel is really comfy too. it's those type that you feel yourself sinking in when you lie in them. it's a pity wanyun dear was sick or else she could have stayed up and took more photos with us. get well soon wanyun!!

we had shooters drilling session before the match in which jeanne, annarine and mel shoots twenty goals each set and if anyone misses, one group have to do sprints down the court. pretty tiring but i think our shooters accuracy had improved along with this session. good job fellow shooters!

date/time Thursday, April 19, 2007,5:10:00 PM

friendly match with cjc turned out okay i guess. even though we won them but ms yim felt that it wasnt a very good play for the seniors. btw, i got to umpire for the very first time! (: it's really really fun but in the same time stressful because players on court stare at us for not blowing for some fouls here and there. and i blowed wrongly a couple of times. blahh. i wonder how yanling could umpire so well

i guess the team really needs alot of confidence and faith in themselves. no matter how much we cheer outside court, it's not going to help if we lack the belief that we can beat our opponents. so let's really work hard now for 6 more days, we'll pull it through and i believe that our hard work will definitely pay off in the end.

let's work towards our common goal and get into the second round girls! we can do it and we will do it.

date/time Tuesday, April 17, 2007,10:11:00 PM

we were really bored in school so we started playing with this bubble thing that we used to blow when we were kids. melissa tan gave it to me. it was part of her council elections campaign. that's the bubble i blew (: with stupid wanyun posing behind when i was just trying to take a photo of my bubble. wells..

friendly match with JJC wasnt as difficult as i thought it'll be. i thought JJC was really really good because according to the NSL magazine they won first for some netball competition. NJC won in the end. good job from all the seniors! ((: i hope it'll boost the morale.

friendly match with CJC tml and i think it'll be the first time we gonna wear our netball skirts on court. i dont like my skirt. it's erm longer than others and i dont feel comfortable wearing it and our new jerseys coming in tml. maybe it's only the seniors' nike one i dont know. hope our custom made ones will come tml too and hope they'll look good.

date/time Sunday, April 15, 2007,2:18:00 PM

my mood is so much better now with all the stuff cleared up.

anyway i spent the whole afternoon yesterday dying my hair but when i met up with huiwei at night she couldnt even spot the difference because she said my hair was already brown in the first place. but actually the colour now is more of red than brown. ahhs. never mind. i'm sure somebody will notice it.

i feel like posting random photos now. so here it is:

date/time Saturday, April 14, 2007,10:42:00 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JINGWEN!

Attended jingwen's birthday party tonight. thanks for the invite, jingwen! (: it was at downtown east chalet. she provided loads of food which i seriously cant afford to take much of it. yeah i went with huiwei and we sat there and talked about almost everything. from school to class to friends. i'm coming to realise that i'm not that happy with my class after all. is it really we're exluding ourselves away from the class or is the other way round?

anyway the match yesterday was good for ONLY first 4 quads. i dont feel like mentioning anything after that seriously.

sometimes i really feel that you don't treasure this friendship at all. i feel that you just want me to listen to you more than you'll listen to me. when i try telling you how upset i feel, you'll tell me how minor my problems are compared to yours. you want me to apologise first and humour you till you're satisfied when you're angry with me or faking that you are. you like to put me down so you'll seem more superior. you like to criticise me and my stuff whenever you like and feel like it. i feel that you think that many others are of lower capabilites than you. you werent like this before. did i do something wrong to bring that change of attitude of yours towards me? if i did, i'm sorry. but i'm so tired of humouring you just because i don't want to lose you, my friend. you know that i couldnt more or less depend on anybody else except you.

date/time Thursday, April 12, 2007,5:23:00 PM

today is such a random and funny day. especially on the way home. was supposed to go estivos after school with best but she cant make it due to chemistry make up lessons. and we had our annual OBS talk today after school.

so should i go for the 7 days in singapore pulau ubin one or the 10 days one at malaysia Lumut? you know there's leeches there and i'm not that fond of them actually. but i think the story that joyce told us about this guy having leeches in his underpants during his OBS trip is pretty hilarious (: anyway i think i'll choose the singapore one instead. the previous 5 days OBS trip last year was already able to give me an infected scar on the knee and high fever. i dont think i cant withstand ten days at malaysia.

yeahh the funny part of the day came along on my way home from school. this woman around her forties was sitting in front of me in the bus and apparently she forgot to zip her pants. 0.0 so erm yeah i dont have to describe how disgusting everything look right. i was so glad when half way through the bus ride she decided to cross her legs which it made it less traumatising for me. it was later then i realised she was going to alight at the same bus stop at me at amk hub there. so after alighting the bus i went straight up to her and told her that she didnt zip her pants. she said "oh" and the last thing i saw was that she was attempting to zip it up. yeah.. it was seriously hard to restrain the laughter. hahas.

by the way happy birthday, cheng siang! i have her cake in my fridge now. gonna give her a surprise tml before the meridian institute match. how fun! anyway joey was just telling me how tough the training was yesterday especially for the shooters. i cant help but feel relieved. and we gonna have a friendly match with cjc soon too. maybe jeanne will get to see how that girl, monique, looks like.

date/time Wednesday, April 11, 2007,8:18:00 PM

didn't go for training today because the pain is killing me during lessons. i went straight home after school, took a long nap and i feel so much better now..

friendly match with meridian institute on friday. i didnt know there was such an institute. i always thought there was only meridian jc.

oh yes by the way there was this career scholarship fair today in school and there was this CAAS scholarship thing. it involves working at the airport and i find it really interesting. but it requires a B3 for GP?! sigh. anyway it's too early to think about scholarships now. also, i just found out my parents are really enthusiastic about the idea of sending me overseas to study. but personally, i'm not that interested.

anyway, do you really think it's very funny to not do what i tell you to do for our project? i waited for like 3 hours for your share of work to be sent to me and you didnt send it to me. when i asked you why, you freaking got the guts to tell me you just dont want to do it now and you'll give it to me tml. i dont want it tml i just want you to do it right now. it's just a couple of sentences. what is so hard about that? it's always like that for many of you guys, i dont mean allm in class. always assuming the girls have to do all the project work for you guys because you all cant be bothered. or you all just think that we will just do it for you because the work you hand in back to us is like shit? seriously, can you all be more considerate? i'm sick tonight and im still stayed up late to do my share of work. i really cant stand some people anymore.

date/time Tuesday, April 10, 2007,9:51:00 PM

sheesh i left my school uniform at kallang netball centre. i dont think i can get it back. oh wells ):

today's not my day. it's just one of those times when you dont want to be a girl. ahh never mind.

didnt do much for trainings lately because nationals is approaching and there's no time for the ips now. i know and i understand. it's just that sometimes i feel that instead of going down and not doing much, i would like to put that time into my studies. apparently i doze off many times a day during lessons and i dont understand what some subjects are all about now. yeah i know nationals is approaching and we have to endure it and everything will be better after that. but it's just very difficult for me to catch up after that when in the first place i'm not that good with studies and i'm quite dumb as you can see.

and will you please not let me feel even more frustrated with my life now than i'm already are. thank you

date/time Sunday, April 08, 2007,10:08:00 AM

it was pouring so heavily over at kallang netball centre yesterday that all the courts were flooded. we had to use the rollers to "roll" the water away. there i was trying hard to roll the water away, our ms joey tay and ms wenjia stood there and simply laughed at me just because i have a unique way of doing things. sickening.

yup training was fine and had to rush off to choa chu kang for this ritual thing made for my grandparents since it's approaching their death anniversaries. okay. the whole event is so exaggerated. all my relatives have to pay like thousands of dollars for it including my parents? seriously i dont really see the point of doing it because i'm a freethinker.

don't let me mess up your life. i'm telling you it's not worth it because that's not what you're looking for.

date/time Saturday, April 07, 2007,8:46:00 AM

shopping trip yesterday proved great. got my adidas bag, 2 shirts, a belt and my favourite candy from marks and spencer (: but poor pauline got herself bankrupt and in debt to me yesterday. you should have seen what she bought. i think she spent over a hundred. i was the one who asked her to go out shoppong with me and it turned out that she spent so much more than me. therefore we gonna start stop eating so much in order to save up money.

anyway, pictures!

all the stuff i bought ytd

xiuhui's birthday and the banner we made for her

celebration of yifeng's and yaoen's birthday outside pe room

date/time Thursday, April 05, 2007,10:47:00 PM

it's good friday tml which means there's no school! pauline and i gonna spend the whole of tomorrow shopping. apparently there's some stuff that i need to get by tml. it includes a new school bag because my puma bag kind of tore at the sides and one or two ankle guard for netball. so many girls sprained their ankles already and i seriously dont want to try it. i've never sprain it before.

oh yes. it's my dad's birthday today. so i decided to help him with the dishes today. im such a filial daughter isnt it? i normally dont do the dishes in the bright early morning because i'm always a walking zombie in the morning.

yeap. pauline and i finished our 2.4 today with a great improvement each. i managed to achieved 11.25 minutes. improved 20 seconds this time. i was just recalling how happy i was with myself when i ran 14.23 mins during sec 2 at sngs. hahas.

date/time Sunday, April 01, 2007,10:22:00 AM

finally finally went back sngs after almost 5 months later? hahas. huiwei and i decided to go back to see the band since syf is approaching. i went in and really felt that i was a visitor more than an ex-student there. jingwen msged me saying that the band was at the dance studio but we kind of forgot where it was and walked to the forum and i saw mijie and wan er there!! they were preparing for some lit seminar thing. we got some directions from them too.

jingwen said ms sia wasnt coming that's why i decided to go back this sat. but in the end she was there! i really didnt want to see her. oh yeah she kicked out some of the sec 2s out of syf again. like wad she did to me two years ago? that's definitely something i dont want to recall again. anyway i think the band sound really good and the song is nice (:

went out for lunch with jingwen pam yanzhu and huiwei after that at amk hub pepper lunch. talked alot about the band now and i found out many things changed. shocking changes as well. by the way, pam wants to come to njc! what great news (:

thinking about it. i really cant imagine my life staying with band for 4 whole years under ms sia. looking back my life really sucked to quite a certain extent but of course there are friends in st nicks who helped to salvage that.